Many people are on a search for love.
We are told that all of our problems will resolve if we only found our one true love and soul mate.
While it is wonderful to experience the companionship and growth that come from a loving relationship, it is very important to remember that the most important relationship we have is with ourselves. True healing and happiness come from within us and not from external sources.
That being said, I know the deep longing people feel for a meaningful relationship. For years I would hope that I would meet the one person that made my heart sing. I never understood why things always went awry in the boy department. It wasn't until I started a journey of self love that I began to attract the right people into my life. Listed below are a combination of tools I used to attract the rockstar of a man that is my soulmate.
1. I Made Room
The art of Feng Shui states that clutter can block vital energy & lead to a lack of manifestation. In order to send a message to the universe that I was ready and open for love, I made space in my bedroom and life. By cleaning up my schedule and cleaning out my nightstands and closet, I energetically made room for that special someone to come into my life.
If you have every second of your day scheduled and you are overstressed, this is a big fat sign to the universe saying "I'm too busy for a guy right now, so don't send me a relationship." We don't want that now do we? When you make time and space in your life for a relationship, you will see the value in having alone time (until you find your love) and you will send the message to the universe that you are ready and open for love.
2. Recognize Negative Patterns
When I looked back at my failed dates and relationships, I noticed certain patterns that needed to heal if I wanted the man of my dreams. For example, my low self-esteem and terrible body image led me to attract guys that also suffered from the same issues. I attracted relationships that were toxic and ultimately unfulfilling. I also noticed that I had the pattern of holding in my wants and needs in order to appear easy going and "cool." This bad pattern only served to drown relationships because I wasn't being authentic or shining my light.
It's important for you to look back on your past relationships and notice any negative patterns that stem from your thoughts, perceptions and actions. Really take a long look at your patterns in relationships but please do so through the eyes of compassion & forgiveness instead of judgment.
3. Forgive and Let Go
Practicing forgiveness is so important in order to manifest the man of your dreams. Only through forgiving the past can we let go of negative energy and clear the way for manifestation. Try this tool to help clear away past events or hurts that need forgiveness.
- Find a comfortable and quiet place where you won't be disturbed.
- Take a seat with a pad of paper and a pen
- Take a couple deep breaths
- Begin to list any past memories that caused any mental, emotional or physical pain. List everything out that you can possibly remember. This includes past arguments, being teased or bullied, embarrassing situations, mistakes, being physically harmed in any way, etc. You may feel emotions well up as these memories come to light so please be gentle with yourself.
- Once you have your list, take some more deep breaths to calm and center yourself.
- Read the first item on the list and bring that situation/memory to mind. Holding that memory in your mind, say "I release you, I forgive you, I love you."
- Continue to do this for each item on the list (repeating it for some items if necessary) until you feel a sense of peace when looking at each statement.
4. Make Your List
Now comes the fun part! Take a piece of fancy paper (or write this in your journal) and list out all of the things that you want in your ideal partner. The reflection, self-love, and forgiveness exercises will really help you see the qualities and characteristics you truly want in your soulmate. Have fun making this list and tell self-judgement to take a hike during this exercise.
5. Bring Out an Attitude of Gratitude
Having gratitude is so important when you are trying to manifest your dream partner. Every date I went on, I expressed gratitude to the universe for the opportunity to get to know another human being. Even if the date didn't go well, I focused on things to be grateful for instead of feeling down in the dumps.
Another important exercise is to go through your life and list all of the things you are grateful for. For example, I listed gratitude for my pink barbie convertible I had as a little girl, my intelligence, my travels while playing softball, everything I could think of up to my cute fluffy puppy that was sitting at the end of my bed as I wrote. Give yourself at least half an hour for this exercise because we all have many things in our lives to be grateful for. A grateful heart is like a big shining light to the universe that says, "I am ready for my dream mate!"
So there you have it. These are five tools that you can use to manifest your dream partner. Each of these tools absolutely worked for me and I know they will work for you!
Much love and light!
Your Bio / About You: Megan is a holistic nutrition and life coach in San Diego, CA. Her mission is to spread light and love to the world by helping others on their path of self-love and happiness.